A Life Force Shared
by Saereth
Summary: Hermione is plagued by her past. When Severus finds her near death, he refuses to let her die. What will happen when old magic links two souls so tightly? will they gain a new outlook? or tear each other apart? A dark fiction of love, lust and death. HG/SS, mostly cannon up to HBP WIP Read and Review please
1. Memories of Nothing

_**My first multiple chapter fan fiction. Set post war, with many changes of my own added in. **_  
_**(Not my characters, world, owned by JKR etc.)**_  
_**Thanks to the many likes and reviews, encouraging me and helping where I've dropped the ball with grammar and spelling. -Re uploaded to edit some mistakes- **_

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Chapter one

Memories of nothing

The greatest war the wizarding world had ever known was over. Harry potter, chosen one and leader of the rebellion had triumphed. With Voldemort dead and his followers scattered to the winds, wizards and witches everywhere celebrated the new found age of peace. Except for one person.  
Hermione Granger.  
Although she was genuinely happy that the community could now reside in safety, her best friends alive and well, she simply couldn't escape her own mind.

Drastic changes had been made to the wizarding world and the Hogwarts education system after the war. Professor Severus Snape, with his name cleared of all war crimes, and newly declared war hero, had declined the offer from the Ministry to remain as Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and Professor Mcgonagall had been reinstated. She had however requested that Snape stay on teaching in his old profession as potions-master, as Professor Slughorn had decided it was well and truly time he retired. Lupin had also been allowed to return to the post of Defense against the dark arts teacher, and with a few well placed comments from Mcgonagall on how bigotry had been a great deciding factor in the war, he had been welcomed back happily by the community.

With the need to further educate young witches and wizards in mind, the Ministry of Magic had arranged optional courses at Hogwarts for students who had come of age. These classes would include a 3 year course  
in any elected fields of magical study chosen by the student. As well as a 6 month apprenticeship offered by each of the corresponding teachers to the top students.  
These apprenticeships would also assist with the extra amount of students and classes handled by the school.

And so, after a years break to rest and rebuild, Hermione had returned to Hogwarts. Now in the final year of her lessons, she sat curled up in her compartment on the Hogwarts express, leaning against the glass window and watching the fields and trees hidden in the soft rain speed by. Ginny was spread out along the seat beside her, leaning comfortably on Hermione's shoulder, while Luna and Neville sat opposite them playing a game of wizard chess.  
Neville was constantly trying not to give away the fact that he had been letting his girlfriend win for the past three games, as Luna tried more and more unorthodox game plans.

Bored of her magazine, Ginny threw it over dramatically to the ground and sighed. "hey Neville?" , "hmm?" came is mumbled response as he creased his brow and continued to stare at his game.  
"I heard you're a shoe-in for the Herbology Apprenticeship this year. Are you going to take it if you get it?", he looking up at Ginny. "Well, that's a pretty big if I think. Though it would be great to get it, and it would give me time to work on some of my thesis about temperate zones and early development stages of the Wilson vines".  
"I think it would be wonderful if you got it Neville!" chimed in Luna. "I could do some traveling with father throughout the year, and see you in the holidays that way! I don't think I could take an apprenticeship myself, I'd rather be out making im own discoveries".  
"and what about you 'mione?" Ginny rolled over so she could look up at her friend, who was still gazing wearily out the window. "Hello? earth to Hermione! are you listening at all?" Yet still Hermione stared. Ginny had been worrying about her best friend more than ever lately. All she did was gaze off, loosing herself in her own mind. She hardly ate, and as far as Ginny could tell, she never slept. It was a wonder she still managed to out do all the other students in the senior classes. Yet that was Hermione she guessed, even during the war she had excelled far beyond others.  
Finally drawing impatient with her, Ginny aimed a sharp jab into Hermione's ribs with her fingers. "Oi! I'm talking to you missy!"  
Hermione jumped and let out a yelp. "Oi yourself!" she exclaimed, shoving the red haired girl off her and aiming a light hearted smack at her. "I'm sorry" she sighed, shutting her eyes. "Just thinking about this year is all. It will be the last time we get to call Hogwarts home. I wish Harry and Ron had taken the courses" she said, not for the first time. Harry had declined to take more schooling, and instead taken a position in the Auror office, tracking down any dark wizards who dared raise their ugly heads. Ron, to the surprise of no one, had stoutly refused to go back to school, and instead took to focusing on his quiddich career.  
Without her two friends, who had been more like brothers, Hermione had returned to Hogwarts along with Ginny, Neville and Luna.

But in recent years she had felt a change. Yes she was still top of her classes, she was still the smartest witch of her age, but she was no longer seen to raise her hand urgently with an answer, books no longer held all the answers for her. She had become subdued and withdrawn, prone to harsh mood swings and loss of temper from her lack of sleep. Her once radiant bushy hair had become lank, unkempt and uncared for; its usual sun bleached highlights faded to a deep dark brown, verging on black. Her eyes, once bright with questions, now dull, red rimmed and bruised. She never smiled.  
She let her companions fade back into relaxed conversation and turned towards the window again. Filled with a nervousness at what lay ahead, she felt herself begin to panic. Why was she still coming back here? she could have had a career by now. A relationship. A family even. But year after year she came back. to the only home she had left. After the war she had tried to track down her adoptive mother and father from Australia, but to no avail. They would be fine without her, she supposed, but with such a strong obliviate curse lain on them, the chances of them remembering the small girl they had welcomed as part of their little family all those years ago from the orphanage were slim to none.  
She supposed she had simply chosen to return out of habit. Of no place to go to feel safe. The trauma of the war and seeing so many die had got to her. It had dredged up memories she didn't even know she had, of death..abandonment..fire. No! she thought firmly to herself. It was bad enough these things troubled her in her sleep, without tormenting herself further.  
As the light outside faded and the train grew closer to its destination. Hermione waited and worried. How many moves did she possibly have left?

**-**

_**So let me know what you think! as always, constructive criticism is welcomed.**_


	2. Belladonna Dreams

_**Second chapter. Warnings of suicide and dark themes in this one. -Re uploaded to fix mistakes (again..)-**_

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**Chapter Two**

**Belladonna Dreams**

Hermione was at her wits end. In the month she had been back she hadn't slept in half the nights. The dreamless sleep potions weren't holding back the horrors in her own mind, and no other solutions, including muggle narcotics, had been found. She needed a way out. She needed peace. Sitting in her room in the seniors dorm wing of Griffindor tower, she paced her room. With a quick glance at her clock on the wall, she noted it was nearly 3.00am. She'd had enough. Sliding her robes over her silk nightdress, she dove into her trunk. Just as she thought, in the side compartment folded neatly was the Marauders Map. A gift from Harry since he no longer needed it. She slipped it into her robes and grabbed her wand. Locking her door behind her, she flew silently down the hallway, past the silent doors of the private rooms that her other senior classmates inhabited.  
Running silently across the common room and stepping through the portrait hole, she sneaked a glance at the map. As she thought, no teachers were patrolling the area. Though seniors were permitted out after hours to go visit the library, she had no wish to be seen or stopped. Not tonight, or any other night ever again.  
Down the many stair cases and through the dark hallways, she reached the ground level then turned towards the dungeons, checking the map again to be sure, she followed the path she had walked many times before, happier times, with friends. Now she arrived alone and silent, like a pale wraith, sliding her fingers along the door until she found the lock. She located it and cast a silent unlocking spell, stepping into the potion supplies room. She had to be quick now. No turning back.

Severus Snape woke in his private chambers to flashing red lights and a high pitched whine. _damn_, he thought. rolling himself out of bed, he cast a spell to stop the offending noise. As sleep drained away, he realized it was the trigger alarm to the potions supply room. "stupid nitwit children" , he muttered to himself. Couldn't he have a nights rest without someone getting up to mischief in this castle? Donning his usual black robe, he flung his door open, sending a patronus up towards the Headmistresses chambers. Enough is enough, he thought. As he strode impatiently up a flight of stairs and onto the storeroom level. Whoever it was that had disturbed his sleep and broken in, he would make sure they would be severely punished, if not expelled.  
Robes billowing behind him, he stormed towards the door. It was hanging open. _Not even smart enough to try and hide their tracks_. He rolled his eyes at the stupidity of people in general.

Hermione scrambled hastily towards the back row of shelves, where she new it would be. Lighting her wand with shaking hands, she scanned the top row of glass bottles and containers. _There you are_. The small vial in the top corner glinted malignantly at her, its contents swirling deep purple black with hints of silver green. Dropping her wand to the ground, she lunged for the vial.  
Goodbye memories, She thought with a small grin, as she unstopped the bottle and swallowed its contents. The liquid burned and seared its way down to her stomach, causing her to double over in pain. She dropped the bottle and fell to the floor. Just as the blackness crept over her eyes, and consciousness faded, she saw the glow of her wand disappear and heard the tinkling of glass as the empty vial hit the ground and shattered.

Snape caught the sound of glass smashing as he reached the door. "got you!" he muttered as he flew in, robe floating behind him dramatically. He moved the the end isle with his lit wand raised, and swung around, planning to catch the thief by surprise. Nobody was there. He glared into the dark area and as his wand moved, it reflected something pale at his feet. A body.  
Lunging into action, he kneeled down and lifted the girls head. Granger? Then he glanced to the left and caught sight of the shattered vial. Picking up what was left if it, he turned the label to the light. _Essence of Nightshade_.  
"No!" he shouted, grabbing the girl and shifting her head so he could see her face better. Her lips and mouth were stained dark purple. With the distinct dark veins already forming that confirmed his fears.  
Suddenly the room was filled with light. The voice of Professor Mcgonogall came from the door as her footsteps moved towards him. "Professor Snape?" she inquired. "Call Poppy!" he yelled back at her, his voice filled with anger and panic.  
The headmistress did not need to be told twice, and she sent a patronus flying through the roof. As she rounded the corner, Snape heard her gasp, then lean against the shelves for support."Severus! what on earth?... Miss Granger? Oh no...". Snape turned to her and looked at her steadily, but his eyes betrayed how he felt. "Essence of Nightshade". He muttered weakly. "Oh Severus.." she whispered meekly.  
Madame Promfrey arrived bustling in, clothed in her bed-robes. "What is it? Whats happened? I heard someone say Nightshade...?" She took in the scene of the room and a look of horror crossed her face. "how much?".  
"The whole vial". Snape replied, his voice cracking. He didn't understand. Why had this happened? why did she do this? she was still so young, so smart...she'd survived a war! he thought. Not only survived, but played a key role in ending it! what could have driven her to it? Rage flooded his veins as he thought of how bright she used to be. Eager to learn and even more eager to help. Bossy, know-it-all, proud, brave little Griffindor...  
" -Nothing left to do". he heard the nurse whisper.  
"NO!" he suddenly shouted, turning to the two women standing in the corner. "I did not go through that hell on earth of a war just to see the people who lived squander their potential!", and with that he leaned in close to the still form on the ground. She was so pale...so beautiful...a strangled gasp escaped his throat as a single tear fell from his cheek. It landed on the cold skin of Hermiones', where it sat still shimmering. He closed his eyes and shuddered. Shouts from behind him suddenly pulled him back to earth. "Severus look!" exclaimed the Headmistress in wonder. As the tear resting in Hermiones cheek suddenly glowed a bright gold. It dissolved into her skin, and where in sank, color began to spread across her face, down her neck, towards her heart. Where it glowed brighter than ever then disappeared.  
An intake of breath from the motionless body. A fluttering of eyelids. She's alive! "she's alive!" the two women exclaimed in unison, echoing Snapes thoughts. He did not question why, nor how. He simply sighed and stated -"we'd best get this girl to the hospital wing. And contact straight away".  
And with that he lifted the girl in his arms, light as a feather, and held her to his chest as he glided out of the room.

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_**Please read and review! next chapter should be coming soon.**_


	3. Blanket Forts and Fury

_**Third chapter! Sorry for the crit wall of information but there were some things that needed to be explained. Thank you as always for the reads and reviews, they are what keep my confidence to carry on! Next chapter will be a fun one with lots of HG/SS, promise. Re-edited to fix some rather odd mistakes discovered by Moi (guest). **_

**Chapter Three**

**Blanket forts and fury**

Sheets of rain pounded continuously against the arch windows of the hospital wing. A warm fire cracked softly in the corner, flooding the room of beds with a flickering golden glow.

Hermione stirred under her blankets and rolled over. As her drowsiness faded away her eyes shot open.

She sad up urgently and turned her head from side to side in panic.

What happened? Is this the hospital wing? she held her head in both hands as a wave of dizziness and pain overtook her body.

Images suddenly flooded her mind as she curled her knees to her chest. A clock showing 3.00am, darkness... she was running down a hallway. Someone was screaming. There was fire everywhere. A small vial fell to the floor... fire.

Fire?... FIRE! - "NO!" she screamed as she rolled violently to her right, landing with a loud crack on her hands and knees on the cold tiles.

"Oww..." she mumbled pathetically to herself as she tried to stand, but another wave of dizziness took over her and she came back to the floor again.

"Miss Granger!" came the voice of Madam Pomfrey from the end of the hall. "What in heavens name are you doing out of bed!" she chided as she rushed over to Hermiones side, taking her by the arms and hoisting her back onto the bed. "You cannot simply get up and wander around in your condition, dear girl" she said in her no-nonsense tones. As Hermione positioned herself back in the bed and leaned against the pillows, the nurse explained. "You've been very ill and need to rest. Asleep for over three days and extremely malnourished! Not to mention the amount of poison running through your system lately! You - " She cut herself short. "Well, anyway...enough chit-chat deary, I'll let the Headmistress know your awake. Oh, and Professor Snape will want to be alerted as well".

"Snape?" She asked, narrowing her eyes. "Why would he want to know?"

"Professor Snape dear. He's been monitoring your condition night and day. Barely left your side he has!" She looked at Hermione with a mix of compassion and pity. "He's the one that found you Miss Granger. And saved you. But that's enough for now. You need to rest and I have work to do. I'll let the Headmistress explain things to you in more detail later", and with that she gathered her skirts and headed back towards her office, leaving Hermione's curtains open just a fraction.

Saved me? she wondered. Why would he save me? How did he save me? She knew Nightshade essence was extremely toxic. There should have been no way...

She let out a mixed sigh of anguish and frustration as she rolled over. That man has some real explaining to do...

Hermione woke later that afternoon to find she wasn't alone. She had been sleeping with her head under the blanket and, as she opened her eyes, she realized she was staring at Ginny, who had sneaked her way into the bed and hidden herself under the blankets along with her friend.

The two girls stared at each other under the dim light of the white sheet, and Hermione felt her chest tighten. "Oh Gin...".

The redhead just smiled and held her close as tears began to fall from both of them. Hermione cried into her best friends arms and let all the fear and pain she had held inside poor out.

After a while, her sobs grew quieter and she found her voice again. "How did you get in here? I didn't think visitors would be allowed..."

Ginny gave a grin reminiscent of her twin brothers. "They aren't. I came anyway. Nobody came by, but i don't think they would have noticed my under here with you... I bet you're hoping the world wouldn't notice you either?"

Hermione smiled meekly and gave a weak giggle. "I guess I kind of was. I don't know what to do anymore. But I am sorry I scared you..."

" You don't have to apologize. You know I'll be here for you. But you do need to come out from under these sheets!"

The two girls looked at each other and burst into fits of giggles.

A voice suddenly cut through from the end of the bed, "I suggest the both of you come out from under there, and then you might be so kind as to allow the rest of us to partake in whatever is so amusing".

The two girls stopped mid laughter and froze, exchanging silent glances. Hermiones mouth dropped in horror and she began to pale. They both recognized the patronizing tones of their potions master.

Ginny saw the look of dread on her best friends face and did the first thing that came to mind. "Sorry sir, nobody here. Please come back later!"

Hermiones face twisted between horror and amusement as they cowered under their makeshift fort.

"Miss Granger" came the voice of Professor Mcgonagall, "and whoever else is under there, please come out so we can speak with you". Here tones were clipped but sincere.

"Stay..." Ginny whispered, and then she was sitting up. Hermione lay still concealed, the sheer awkwardness of the situation distraction her from her own problems entirely.

"Miss Weasley! whatever are you doing in here?" The headmistress exclaimed. "Hermione needed me" She replied simply.

"Well, as glad as i am that you're Griffindor loyalty to friends is ever present, we must speak with Miss Granger".

"Hold on" she said, diving back under the blankets.

"Well? they want to speak to you, but I can make them go away if you want?" she whispered to Hermione. "They? who's else is there exactly?" she whispered back.

"Mcgonogall, Snape, Pomfrey, Lupin and a bunch of guys in white coats. I think they're from St. Mungos..."

"Mungos? what on earth are they here for? Ohhh..." she resigned herself to the impending conversation. Peeking slightly above the sheets, her eyes immediately fell on Snape, and she felt her cheeks flush red.

"There you are Miss Granger. Nice of you to make yourself present". came the instantly snide remark. She frowned at him and looked away. She was still rather mad at this man foiling her efforts, even if he had saved her life. What business was it if his anyway?

The two girls sat up side by side, Hermione looking enquiringly around the crowd at the foot of her hospital bed, Ginny looking defiant and protective.

"Hermione" started Lupin, moving to her side and putting a calming hand on her shoulder. "I'd like to introduce you to Mr. Gorden. He's head of Potions and Poisons sector of St. Mungos, and Madam Havish, resident Head Mediwitch of Psychological Trauma. They've been reviewing your case you see..." He gestured towards the bald man and bespectacled blond witch respectively, who smiled politely back at her.

"Reviewing my case, sir?" She looking from Lupin to Mcgonagall slowly, feeling dizzy from moving her head. She could feel the beginnings of a headache coming on.

The men and women surrounding her glanced at each other, then for some reason, at Snape.

"I assume you are all expecting me to explain the situation then?" he raised an eyebrow questioningly at Mcgonogall. The elder witch nodded in reply.

"Very well then. Miss Granger. Bypassing what bought you to your recent actions for the moment, there seems to be an unexpected turn of events lain upon the two of us."

She saw Ginny give her a sideways look and ignored her. Turning to face Snape, she stared levelly at him until he continued.

"Upon discovery of you four nights ago, you were in a steadily declining state of toxication. The amount of essence which you had imbibed should have, as you are no doubt aware of, caused your death long before the appropriate antidote could be administered". At this he paused ( rather dramatically, Hermione thought), and looked around.

"However." He ploughed on with the air of someone who wanted to get something over with quickly, "It seems that, at the last moment..." He paused again.

"What Professor Snape is trying to say I think" Lupin picked up the trail of sentences, "Is that, when a witch or wizard gives their life up deliberately, the life force that they abandon usually dissipates into mild magical energy. However, sometimes in rare cases, It can latch itself onto a soul that is open to it or will not let it leave." He saw her and Ginny's increasingly confused faces on the bed and hurried on. "It just so happens that, in the moments that your life force left you're body, Professor Snape had been attempting to prevent it. Causing it to become attached and combine with his own. He then transferred a small amount of it back to you, reawakening you".

Hermione's brow creased at this "But sir, how did he..erm, transfer it? back I mean?". At this she saw Snape distinctly look in the opposite direction of them, and a small smile appeared on Lupin's face.

"Through the selfless shedding of tears for another, in this case, you. So now it seems, your life force and his are one and the same. This is old magic Hermione. It isn't a very common occurrence and there are very few documents detailing it, hence the presence of our friends from St. Mungos , whom we have agreed to keep in contact with regularly for both study and safety purposes".

Hermione's mind was blank. Her life force? she'd never came across this in any of the books she had ever read. She rested her head in her hands, trying to hold back the lights now beginning to flash behind her eyes.

"So what does this mean then?"

Mcgonogall took over explaining. "It means, Miss Granger, You and Professor Snape share a single life force, currently residing within Professor Snape. In order for you to live, the two of you must remain in proximity as much as possible, as well as transference through contact. Your remaining years have been added to the proverbial life pool of his own, extending it considerably, unless of course the transference continues throughout your lives'.

"Hold up!" Ginny finally interrupted, still curled up on the bed with Hermione. "Hermione abandons her remaining life force. It gets snatched up by Snape. And what? he keeps it? So he's basically in charge of keeping her alive now?". Lupin laughed softly, "Put simply, yes Ginny. The more time they are apart, the weaker Hermione will get. It's a very unusual situation that will require a lot of changes, as well as cooperation between Professor Snape and Miss Granger. As you may guess, It is quite the responsibility for Severus".

Hermione felt sick. Not only was she back where she started, but now she was tied up to Snape! Like he was supposed to be in charge of her or something. She needed to rest, to think this through. If he was expected to watch her at every moment, then what was she going to do? Trail along behind him for the rest of their now joined lives? She couldn't even understand why he had cared enough to save her. She felt anger rising in her chest and cloud her mind. Keeping her head in her hands she finally spoke: "Thank you all for explaining this. It's a lot to take in for me, as I'm sure you all understand. If possible, I would like to speak in private with Professor Snape?" she said questioningly towards the dark man now standing in the corner. They all nodded, with mutters of 'feel better' and a hug and whisper of "good luck" from Ginny, then filed out of the hospital wing.

She was left sitting in bed, with a very dour Snape now taking up the space next to her. She looked up at him, and, seeing his emotionless expression and accusing eyes, she couldn't stop the anger from finally bursting out of her. "How dare you..._HOW DARE YOU_!"

_**So let me know what you think! Any suggestions are welcome as well as comments or constructive criticism. next chapter coming soon!**_


	4. Anger and Ecstasy

**Chapter Four**

**Anger and ecstasy  
**

"How dare you!" Hermiones voice shrilled through the hospital wing. "How could you have done this?! and why? you think just because your older than me you know whats best? or is it just a male thing? traipsing around treating all girls like bloody damsels in distress! And then you humiliate me! I was the last to know!" She stopped to take a breath, her face red from yelling.

Snape eyed her expectantly "Are you quite finished Miss Granger?" he said. "_NO I AM NOT BLOODY FINISHED_!" she screeched, sitting up on her knees and trying to ignore the wave of vertigo that followed. "You all just come in here and inform me, as though everything's already decided? Like I'll just go along and do as im told? _Not bloody likely_!" and with that she threw the bedsheets down and swung herself out of bed.

Snape watched half annoyed and half amused as Hermione attempted a dignified storm off.

'Attempted' being the key word. She made it four steps away before clutching her head and collapsing to her knees.

She let out a pained groan and hunched herself over. Snape approached tentatively from behind and stood glaring down upon her.

"What did you do to me..." she spat venomously at him. "I have done nothing to you which would be a detriment to your health Miss Granger" he replied in a bored drawl. "You are simply feeling the effects of a depleted life force. If you had stayed in your bed and simply listened to me you would understand. As has just been explained, you must allow time for me to transfer it to you, otherwise the dramatic scenes you cause with such uncontrolled temper will likely always end with you on the floor".

She let out an impatient noise, but seemed to calm down a bit. Snape reached for her to offer assistance, but she leaned away from him, guiding herself uneasily back to the bed.

Snape settled himself back in the armchair beside her, offering his hand casually towards her own. Though he had no desire to sit around holding his students hand, it was the most convenient way of getting the ordeal over for now.

She reluctantly accepted, sliding her own small hand into his smooth, well manicured one. His hands were surprisingly warm, she thought to herself, leaning back into the pillows and attempting to ignore the blush now rising in her cheeks.

The warmth between their hands grew, spreading up her arm. She wondered it was supposed to feel that way...

.

.

Then a wave of heat hit her chest and ran through her, igniting her skin and electrifying her nerves. Spots of color filled her eyes, obscuring her vision. Her limbs felt like they had been filled with molten lead, and her entire body was overly sensitive to every touch and sound. She was in ecstasy... and her last thoughts before her mind became overwhelmed was that _this is what her life had been missing..._

Severus had not escaped the effects of the transfer either. He felt the heat rise from where her hand rested in his, and watched curiously as closed her eyes, arching her chest up off the bed as though she were in throws of passion. She let out a soft moan and Severus shuddered, his entire body filled with a tingling sensation, causing every movement and noise to have an effect on him. He felt a content relaxation fill his body, and his heart pounded in his chest. He looked over at Hermione hazily, watching he even rise and fall of her chest as she breathed. She looked so touchable... before he knew what he was doing, he reached across with his other hand, brushing her hair from her cheek softly. Odd, he thought, as the contact filled his fingers with crackling nerves, he could have sworn her hair had been lighter... as he watched, the hair in his fingers glowed a light brown, reminiscent of her older self, and as he took his hand away it dissipated back to its lank dark tones.

He leaned back in the chair, still holding her hand, and let a wave of exhaustion overtake him as he fell into blackness himself.

.

.

.

Hermione woke hours later, feeling oddly refreshed. The sky was dark outside, and the wall sconces were lit. She looked over at the armchair next to her and saw Professor Snape, head tilted slightly to one side, sound asleep.

She frowned at him, trying to remember what had happened. She guessed the transfer must have had a similar effect on him. She sat quietly, looking at him.

_He's such a mystery. Why is he always trying to save people? maybe he likes making himself a martyr?_

She wasn't ungrateful to him, and now that her previous anger was gone, she realized just how much of a sacrifice he was making for her. His entire existence was now roped to her own. He had fought bravely and given so much during the war, and now he had a new concern. She looked out the dark windows sadly. This was the first time in so long that she had slept without waking in a panic, covered in sweat.

But she was still frightened. She new the memories wouldn't leave her alone. She also new that she couldn't simply lay around and endure it, no matter what the man guarding her had given. He could keep her life force, she thought. She had no want or need of it, and she certainly didn't want to spend and extended life time with Snape. She just had to come up with something new was all...

"Professor?" She leaned over and whispered to him. "Professor Snape?" Still he slept on.

Loosing patience she shouted "Professor! wake up!".

He jumped suddenly to his feet, wand raised and ready to fight. Hermione started to giggle at his reaction, causing his attention to be drawn to her.

His eyes narrowed, causing her to laugh even more. "Miss Granger, how are you feeling?" he said, not happily. "Better Sir" She replied, stifling her laughter. "But its late, and I didn't think you would be too happy spending the night in a chair. Don't you have class tomorrow?".

Snape nodded. "Yes, so as long as you are feeling ok, I will retire. No doubt you will be back in classes yourself soon" and with that, he glided from the room, leaving Hermione alone. She reached over and turned her light on, grabbing one of the books on her side table, left by Ginny. It was going to be a long night.

_**Let me know your thoughts! next chapter coming soon.**_


	5. Slytherin Secrets and Party Presents

_**The latest chapter, a bit longer with a bit less going on, but still fun to read and write :) I realy do love getting reviews, so if you want to say something, let me know!**_

**Chapter 5**

**Slytherin secrets and party presents**

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It had been a week since Hermione's talk with Snape. He hadn't been back since to check on her, but she had received a message two days ago from him, detailing the date, time and place of their next session. She was not looking forward to it. What she was looking forward to however, was leaving the hospital wing that evening. waiting for the final ok of Madam Pomfrey, she sat on her bed reading. Ginny was sitting with her, chatting incessantly about everything she had missed in the school year so far. It lifted Hermione's spirits whenever Ginny had came around that week, hearing the little things and the gossip from her loving friend made her eager to get better.

Her sleeping had gone disrupted since her first session with Snape. She wondered if it was one of the properties of the transfer. She certainly felt better physically too. Some color had returned to her cheeks, and her eyes were no longer bloodshot and bruised.

" -but you know how Slytherins can be" came the end of Ginny's sentence. "oh! whats the time?" She exclaimed suddenly, jumping from the bed and causing Hermione to loose her page. "Nearly six! I have to go, we're planning something for your release!"

Hermione smiled. "You don't have to do that Gin, I'll be perfectly happy to sleep in my own room again is all"

But Ginny was already gathering her things and heading towards the door. "I'll see you shortly"

and with that she hurried out the doors.

Hermione sat back and sighed. She looked out the windows, wondering if she would have time for a walk in the grounds before the sun disappeared. The weather was still cold as the year moved further into winter, but she missed being outside. She couldn't even remember the last time she'd been outside, with her mind being such a blur lately.

The room suddenly filled with noise and bustle as a group of people came in. Slytherins. She looked up with interest when she recognized the sliver blonde hair of Draco Malfoy.

Covered in mud, with all of them yelling wildly, Hermione gathered that they had been out flying in the Quiddich field, and that a fight had broken out between them, one thing led to another and Malfoy had ended up with a broken arm.

She listened intently to their conversation as Madam Pomfrey approached.

"Whats all this then?" she inquired. They all broke out speaking again, with a disgruntled looking Malfoy sulking in the middle.

"Ok, that's enough then. I don't need to hear your life stories! You can all leave. , sit on the bed. I'll be with you momentarily" and she headed to her store cupboard as the slytherins filed out.

Madam Pomfrey came back holding a small glass of blue liquid. "Now, I'm going to re-bind the bones dear, then you can drink that for the swelling" Muttering something, a soft ribbon of light wrapped around his arm.

Hermione realized then that she didn't know the spell for something like that, and made a mental note learn medi-spells as a new side project.

"What are you staring at, Granger?" The snide remake flew from across the room from where malfoy sat.

"Nothing Malfoy, so don't flatter yourself" She responded with instinctive hostility.

"Haven't seen you in class all week. Not giving up are you?" he remarked casually. His choice of words struck an odd chord with Hermione. "If you think I'm the kind of person to be scared off by a large study load, then you've obviously never seen me in classes".

"Now who's flattering themselves Granger? As if I'd spend my class time watching Know-it-all Griffindors" he chuckled for effect.

"Then why not my lack of presence lately Malfoy?" She lowered her head. Her was just as annoying as ever, but she couldn't risk loosing her temper so close to being let out.

A shadow fell over her bed and she looked up. Malfoy was standing at the end of her bed, arms crossed, deliberately not looking at her."I know how you feel Granger" He whispered. "Oh?" was the only reply she could think of to the sudden turn of conversation.

"Don't think your the only one who's ever been there little lion. Or don't you remember the events of our sixth year?" Hermione clued on to what he was getting at. "You mean... you? oh..." she fell silent.

"Yeh. Maybe I'll tell you about it sometime" He smirked.

Shocked at his sincerity ( Not to mention the replacement of the usual "mudblood" title he used for her ) she smiled. "That would be nice Malfoy. But tell me. How did you know?..."

At this he chuckled again as if the answer were obvious. "What family do you think funds these unusual 's studies?".

Hermione rolled her eyes inwardly. Just my luck, she thought.

Madam Pomfrey re-emerged from her office. " . I told you to sit and rest. Now get back to your bed. you may go, do not hesitate to call on me if you feel you need more rest though" she said.

Hermione gathered her bag, and turned to Malfoy. "I would appreciate it if..." but he cut her off.

"This conversation will be our secret, little lion. And any others we may or may not have" and he turned away from her. She hurried out the door and into the hallway, still wondering what just happened. Malfoy was... well the only word for it was: nice. Acting like a friend? She worried if maybe he had been messing with her, and she was too slow to realize.

She headed upstairs to the Griffindor common room. Pausing at the painting of the fat lady, she realized Ginny hadn't told her the new password.

"Umm" the woman in the painting stared at her expectantly. Then she was gone as the portrait swung open.

"There you are!" came the voice of Ginny. "Here come in and get changed, we have a surprise for you!" She grabbed Hermiones hand and pulled her through. "The new password is 'Ophiuchus' by the way" she said, hurrying Hermione up the stairs and along the seniors corridor to her room.

"Now, I want you to freshen up, then meet me in the common room in fifteen minutes, ok?" and then she disappeared into her own room.

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Fifteen minutes later, Hermione walked out into the common room, wearing a simple black dress that fanned at the waist and floated around her knees. She hadn't bothered with makeup, but she had stopped to enjoy the use of a private bathroom again.

"Ready?" said Ginny. "Good. Put this on" and she held out a strip of black cloth. Wrapping it around Hermiones head, and making sure she couldn't see a thing, Ginny finally exclaimed "off we go!" and started guiding her to Merlin knows where.

After wandering blindfolded through the castle, with only Ginny to guide her, and after stumbling several times, Hermione couldn't wait any longer. "Are we there yet? or are we just going to do this all night" she laughed at her friend.

"No were pretty much there. Ok stand her!" Hermione felt Ginny's hands on her waist as she positioned her. She heard a door open, and felt a cold breeze on her face. "Ok, you can take the blindfold off now" came Ginny's voice further ahead of her. She felt around her head for the knot and untangled the cloth from her hair. Opening her eyes, she was met with a breathtaking sight.

They were on a wide balcony overlooking the forest. Hedges and bushes in pots hovered gently around the edges, filled with small twinkling lights. Red and gold balloons filled the area above her head, and streamers curled themselves in between.

Standing in between clusters of couches and armchairs ( Some she thought she recognized from the Griffindor common room) in the center of the floor stood a group of people. Hermiones eyes fell over them one by one, the happiness in her chest growing and tears starting to fall as she recognized them. Neville and Luna stood the the right, holding hands. Ginny stood next to them. She recognized Pravati and Lavender, Fred and George beamed at her from the left, and in the middle of them stood a small table with a large box.

"Oh Ginny!" She ran up and hugged her friend. "How? I've never seen this area before! and what are Fred and George doing here? How did they get in?".

"Well, we came through the painting in the hogshead" said George as the two boys came in and hugged her as well. "We were going to use the room of requirement" Ginny said, "But we thought something with a view would be better, It was Lav that showed us actually".

Hermione hugged the girls who were now giggling hysterically. "The twins and I got the food and drinks while the girls decorated!" exclaimed Neville.

"It's lovely! oh its perfect, thank you all!" Hermione smiled. Happy to feel happy again.

"Come on! open up your present! It took us forever just to wrap up" Fred said, and they all gathered around the table expectantly. Hermione peeled the wrapping off slowly, to reveal a brown box full of small holes. Lifting the lid off slowly, her eyes locked on to a familiar ginger face, complete with glowing eyes. "Oh... Crookshanks!" she shrieked, as the scowling ginger cat climbed up her chest and into her arms, purring contently.

"As much fun as he was having at the burrow, chasing gnomes, we thought he'd be better off here. So we chased him down and boxed him up" said Fred, both twins proudly displaying their scratched up arms. "Thank you all" Hermione started crying again, pressing her face into the soft fur of her feline familiar. They all settled down into the armchairs, pouring themselves and Hermione drinks of firewhisky. Taking a glass from Ginny, Hermione sat in the comfort of her friends. "Now" Ginny started, leaning forward. "What is this about you and Professor Snape?"

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_**Let me know your thoughts! **_


	6. A Beautiful Friendship

_**Sorry for the slow updates, but her it is! Thank you all for the latest reviews, I love hearing them and im glad you're all liking it so far. After this we'll be getting in to plenty of fun Severus - Hermione drama. **_

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**Chapter 6**

**A beautiful Friendship**

Hermione new this was coming. Of course Ginny couldn't have kept her mouth shut about something so big. She shot the redhead a fierce glare, which was returned with a guilty expression. "I'm sorry Hermione, but I knew you would need some support, and I was careful who to tell! Only us here know whats happened. You'll notice the lack of Harry and Ron" she said.

Hermione had noticed. She was also relieved by it. Harry had enough to worry about at the ministry and she and Ron had parted rather clumsily. Even such, they would have stormed the castle wands blazing if they knew.

"It's ok, im glad you did. What have you told them so far?" she asked, finishing her glass and pouring herself another. "They know about the nightshade episode, and how Snape saved you, and that you're both linked in some weird way now. What we want to know is what happens next?"

"Well, im not really sure. For the moment it will be easy I guess. We've arranged a weekly session, in the same way as private classes are run. But after I've finished school it might get a bit difficult..."

"You mean you might have to go_ live _with him?!" an astonished lavender cried, causing the entire group to burst out laughing. "No Lav, have you forgotten? I'm a witch. It would probably suffice to use the floo network for emergencies, that's if I haven't found a way to reverse this hell of a situation. Which I very much plan to do. "

They carried on through the night, drinking and joking, diverting the subject from Hermione, who was glad she hadn't been forced into specifics. The effect that contact between her and Snape had on her was not forgotten, and she wasn't looking forward to her next visit with him.

by midnight they were all thoroughly drunk, and decided to call an end to the balcony party. The Weasley twins departed towards the front hall, planning to continue their carousing down at the three broomsticks, and Luna hugged everyone before making her way toward Ravenclaw tower.

The four Griffindor girls made their way to the dormitory, Hermione cradling crookshanks in her arms. Head spinning, Hermione made it to her room, where crookshanks curled up happily on her pillow. Staring around the room, she realized just how quiet it was. So quiet she could hear the crackle and pop of the small fireplace in the corner. She stood in the middle of the room staring into it, as it cast long dancing silhouettes of her around walls.

Suddenly, she couldn't stand it. She fire put her on edge, and it was definitely far too quiet. She backed out quietly and made her way back through the common room. The hallways were still and dark as she made her way through the castle and out the entrance hall. She stepped out into the cold night air and breathed a sigh of relief. She felt free. Picking up pace, she made her way down through the treeline and stopped when she reached a large, flat rock hanging out over the lake.

She sat on the edge, pulling off her shoes and socks, and let her feet dangle in the cool water. After a while she decided a midnight swim would help clear her head, this may not have been the best decision, but as she was still pretty drunk, this didn't occur to her.

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Severus followed silently as the girl made her way out the doors and across the courtyard.

With strict orders from Dumbledore to keep a close eye on her, not to mention his own feeling of responsibility, he'd made a note to always know her where a bouts.

He wondered where she was going so late at night. He knew she'd been with her friends out on the western balcony, but clearly she hadn't retired with the others, as he'd spotted her earlier on his patrol. She weaved her way towards the lake, still clearly intoxicated, and Severus drew uneasy.

He had no idea what could have driven her to try to kill herself, but had every intention of finding out, and prevent any further harmful actions she may wrought upon herself.

Concealing himself behind a tree, he watched as she took her shoes off and sat on a rock. Her hair fell softly down her back, shimmering in the moonlight, curling and wild, so different from his own strait locks, he'd never noticed how well it suit her...

Then it was gone. Along with the rest of her, as she slid quickly under the surface. Dread filled his heart and he threw himself from the shadows and ran to the edge. The water was still and black, with nothing more than a few bubbles to show where she had gone. She wasn't coming up... he started to panic, then threw himself in after her.

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The water surrounded her and cooled her whole body. It was so peaceful down here, she wished she could stay in that moment forever. But her lungs were beginning to burn in protest, so she opened her eyes, ready to ascend. Through the water, she saw something dark moving above the surface...

Arms wrapped around her waist, and she felt herself being pulled violently upwards. Breaking the surface, she gasped spun around. Treading water next to her, one arm still around her waist, was a very wet, very angry Severus Snape.

"What the hell are you doing?" she yelled at him, stretching her feet out to reach the muddy ground below her.

"I could ask you the same thing." he hissed. Hermione attempted to remove herself from his grasp, but he held her firmly against him.

"Well, I _thought_ I was having a private swim. Apparently I was wrong though, since I wasn't expecting company!" came her angry reply.

"You expect me to believe that you, fresh out of the hospital wing from a suicide attempt, came out her, drunk, in the middle of the night and threw yourself into a lake for a _private swim_?"

"Yes! that's exactly what I expect! what are you doing here anyway? where you following me?"

growing frustrated, he began to make his way to shore, dragging her along with him.

They both fell onto the grassy bank, exhausted and dripping wet. Rolling onto his back to catch his breath, Severus looked over at her, anger fading into annoyance.

"Where you really just swimming? because pulling a stunt like that intoxicated is practically a suicide attempt anyway."

She smiled at the morbid half joke, and lay down on her back beside him. Her body was still tingling where his arm had been, and said "Well, I suppose this is as good a spot as any for our meeting" and slid over so their shoulders touched.

They lay there for a bit in silence, staring up at the clear night sky, when Hermione turned her head to face the man next to her.

"Professor?", he turned his head to look back at her, clearly in a better mood knowing that her swim had been innocent, despite him now being soaking wet, and rose an eyebrow in question.

"We're not far from being complete strangers. Whats done is done, and we seem to be stuck together. But I don't know you at all..."

She was right and he knew it. Aside from having been her teacher, he knew nothing of Hermione Granger the woman. "Well then, I propose we begin to rectify that. My name is Severus Tobias Snape. It's nice to meet you."

Hermione laughed as he reached over with his other hand and held it out. She leaned over and shook it with her own and replied "It's a pleasure to meet you Severus. My name is Hermione Jean Granger." They shook hands and sat up. Severus kept hold of her hand and helped her to her feet. The sensation in his hand where their skin touched was pleasant but not over powering, and he supposed it was because she was not as weak as the first time they touched.

With a last look out over the lake, Hermione turned to him and said. "I think this could be the start of a beautiful friendship", and they walked silently back towards the castle, hand in hand.

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End file.
